Italian family. Raising children in Italy

DatsoPic 2.0 2009 by Andrey Datso

When thinking about an Italian family, many imagine something like a Neapolitan noisy and large family that gathers every Sunday for a traditional dinner, and three children is the norm for her. Is it so?

It is enough to come to Italy for a week to see how they love, literally adore and idolize children here. But what is hidden behind this immense love? Is it so good to forgive a child everything, explaining his misdeeds with the universal excuse “Well, he’s still small”? This and much more is in the story about the Italian point of view on raising children.

Let's start with what you can notice immediately upon arriving in Italy. Children are loved, and not only by their parents, uncles, aunts and grandparents, but in general by everyone they meet, from the bartender to the newspaper seller. All children are guaranteed attention. A passerby can smile at the child, pat him on the cheeks, and say something to him. Sometimes no one turns to the parent, it’s as if he doesn’t exist. By the way (don’t let the comparison offend you), the same attitude applies to animals. For Italians, both kids and dogs are a reason once again be touched and smile.

Italian popes

The second point that catches your eye is the Italian popes. If you go out to the playground in the evening, you will see mostly dads there, not moms, and all of them will be actively rushing with their children from swing to slide, from slide to swing.

If you go to the pool or the beach, in most cases dad will play and fuss with the baby while mom reclines on a sun lounger with a glossy magazine in her hands. You shouldn’t think that raising children is entrusted to dads: no, the responsibilities are simply divided in half, and if the mother spends time with the child at home, cooks him food and plays with him in the garden, then the dad will obviously take care of the baby outside the home, and will do this with great pleasure. No matter what shortcomings are attributed to the Italians, their fathers are magnificent!

An Italian dad will never say, “Raising children is a woman’s job.” On the contrary, he strives to take an active role in the upbringing of his child. Especially if it is a female child! In Italy they say: a girl is born - daddy's joy. Dads adore their babies to the point of madness, while Italian boys, on the contrary, are attached to their mother almost until old age. An Italian macho of about 40 years old who lives with his mother, allows her to cook his own food, wash and iron - a completely standard picture, which is impossible to surprise in Italy. Such men are called “mammon”.

Unfortunately, in modern Italy two, and especially three children are very rare. According to statistics for 2011, per one Italian family accounts for 1.3 children. Over the past decade, the percentage of families who cannot have children has increased greatly. The main reason is the woman's age. Of course, there are families with three or more children, but mostly these are families of the south of Italy or emigrants.

Over the past twenty years, the mentality of Italian women has changed a lot. If earlier they were ready to raise children and sacrifice their interests, now they prefer to study at university until they are 28, then start working, live for their own pleasure, travel until they are 35, and only after that think about having a child. Many modern Italian women, and Italians too, are very childish. At the age of 30, they feel like they are 18 years old, and a child seems to them an unbearable and unnecessary burden.

According to statistics for 2012, the average age of a primigravida woman in Italy is 31.8 years, in Russia, meanwhile, 25.8 years.

Early development

After giving birth to a child, a young mother usually tries to return to work as quickly as possible. And the reason for this is not only the economic crisis in the country, but also the reluctance to stay at home with the child. Usually they are “rented out” to grandparents or to paid nurseries. In large cities there are Montessori nurseries, Waldorf nurseries and even bilingual nurseries, where the baby will hear English spoken from birth. But there are only a few of them. In an ordinary nursery, the baby will be looked after, fed, put to bed, but early development a child is out of the question. And it’s not that they don’t want to develop the child, but it’s not customary for them, and they simply don’t know how to do it at all.

Even if some mother wants to work with her baby, she will have certain difficulties: there is a very small amount of literature about preschool education, a small selection of educational games for kids (I brought suitcases full of books and toys from Moscow for my children) and the virtual absence of any groups for activities with children under 3 years old. The exceptions are music classes and swimming. Of course, this cannot be compared with Russia, where even in small towns you can find different clubs, groups, nurseries and kindergartens for every taste and budget.

At home, an Italian child is usually left to his own devices. He usually has so many toys that they don’t fit in two rooms, but at the same time he doesn’t know at all how to occupy himself and spends all his time at the game console or in front of the TV, fortunately, his parents allow him to do this: he’s not capricious, that’s great! One of my friends complained to me: “Well, I bought him so many toys, I tell him, go play, let him watch TV, but he doesn’t come!” And with an abundance of toys, the child simply does not know how to play. If the baby is lucky and has a brother or sister, then usually their main role-playing game becomes “Give it back, it’s mine!” Teaching a child to play, or even just playing with children, is not accepted here, unlike in Russia, where parents themselves become active participants in children's games.

Kindergarten (Scuolaterna)

In Italy, a child goes to kindergarten from the age of three. There he is taught to count, write, and prepared for school. Teachers pay special attention to the child’s adaptation in the team: group performances, games with the whole class are constantly held, and trips or excursions are carried out at the parents’ request. Usually 2 times a week a lesson is held in a playful way foreign language, most often it is English. Sports classes and music are held several times a week. A lot of time is devoted to creativity: appliqué, drawing, modeling. There are private and public kindergartens, but the program in them is basically the same.

Traditions

It is customary to take children with you everywhere - to weddings, concerts, parties, dinners and aperitifs. From the very cradle, the Italian child leads an active “social life”. Newborn babies almost immediately begin to be walked and carried with them - Italian mothers and fathers do not experience any special fears, except, perhaps, the fear of infecting the baby with something. Belief in the evil eye and the desire to protect the baby from strangers is alive only in small southern towns or among the numerous foreigners who have settled in Italy.

By the way, despite this active life with the participation of children, slings that are so popular in Russia and are convenient for walking, did not take root here. In three years in Italy, I saw only three children in slings, and all of them were children of tourists. Perhaps Italian women use a sling at home, but they rarely go outside with it, giving a clear preference to classic strollers and backpacks.

Fears

Italians are very scared by stories of missing children, so it is extremely rare to see small children running around unattended. Most often, kids walk near their own house, fenced in by a fence, in the garden. It is not difficult to find families where the child is 10-13 years old, but he does not go out alone (not to mention children even younger). By the way, many foreign women let their children go out alone at the age of 6-7: for a true Italian mother this is something abnormal and even wild. Also, children are always picked up from school by their parents, or taken home by a school bus. According to statistics, 60% of Italian children spend free time at home, watching TV, playing, reading. This is also noticeable on the streets: there are many small children with their parents, there are also plenty of teenagers of about 15 years old, but children 7-13 years old are not particularly visible.

Features of education

In Italy, it is customary to address people as “you,” including to elders and teachers. This is not considered rudeness; moreover, it persists in adult life: you in Italy are addressed either to people who are much older, or to someone you are addressing for the first time (although many people immediately switch to “you” if they are addressing a peer or a slightly older person).

Italian children are rarely told not to do something, so they often talk rudely to their parents, grandparents and teachers at school. For example, the answer “Leave me alone,” “You’re stupid,” “Shut up” from a 7-10 year old child to an older relative is quite common and is not even punishable.

Children in Italy generally do not have a “child-adult” barrier; they are not shy about “uncles” and “aunts”; they can approach a woman reading a book on the playground and tell her “Go away, this is a place for children!”

If you start to analyze this behavior, you can connect it with the blind adoration of the “bambino” in the family, and with the fact that at school children can calmly walk around the classroom during the lesson, and not sit from bell to bell, with an atmosphere of freedom and the permissiveness in which they grow up.

Statistical studies also confirm the bad manners of Italian children. 66% of European hotels noted that children from Italy are the most capricious, noisy and loud. What causes the most problems for those around them is that such “bambini” scream very loudly, squeal and constantly swear, using strong words. Little Italians love to run screaming along the corridors, make noise during breakfast, ride back and forth in the elevator and break everything they find in the hotel room. From the parents’ point of view, everything is going according to plan, because the child is “expressing himself.”

In Italy, rarely anyone dares to reprimand even the noisiest child, so mothers and fathers outside of Italy do not understand the negative reaction to the screams of Italians and are indignant. “How can you shut up a CHILD?? How is it possible? Most of all, parents are afraid that if a child is intimidated from childhood with punishments and constantly silenced, he will grow up quiet, notorious and downtrodden. Moreover, raising your voice at your son or daughter is by default considered something bad and wrong, especially in a public place. People will look askance and judge, so we smile and wave while the bambino screeches and runs in circles around the supermarket.

It cannot be said that many establishments have children's corners, but the child will always be accommodated with maximum convenience. Again, children's menus are not the most common thing, so children often eat completely adult food and drink coffee from almost two years old (not every day, of course).

It is customary to address people as “you”, including to elders and teachers. This is not considered rudeness; moreover, it persists into adulthood: in Italy you address either people who are much older, or someone you are addressing for the first time (although many immediately switch to “you” if they are addressing someone of the same age or a slightly older person).

And at the end

Well, I would like to finish by debunking one of the main myths about children in Italy. “There are no orphanages in Italy!” – how often can you hear or read such a phrase. Yes, in fact this is true, since 2006 all orphanages have been closed. But this does not mean that there are no orphans here, or that no one is taking care of them. The so-called “casa-familia” are engaged in raising children left without parents. As a rule, in such an institution there are figures of “mother” and “father”; family and brotherly relationships are established between all children; adults and children live like one big family.

The motto of their work: “Give a family to those who do not have one!” In such houses live not only children abandoned in the maternity hospital, but also teenagers whose parents are unable to fulfill their responsibilities towards them. The Casa Famiglia is rarely large - on average there can be 12 children there at the same time.

Guys, we put our soul into the site. Thank you for that
that you are discovering this beauty. Thanks for the inspiration and goosebumps.
Join us on Facebook And In contact with

Each country has symbols that highlight the identity of its inhabitants. When we think about Italians, we remember not only pizza and wine, but also the friendly company of relatives of all ages at the table. Young mothers who moved to this country admire the cohesion of Italian families and are looking for the secrets of upbringing that help turn the restless “bambini” into charming signors and signorinas.

We are in website studied Italian parenting traditions and selected those that may be useful for moms and dads around the world. We think that they will help parents and children gain a love of life and strengthen relationships not only with close relatives, but also with the outside world.

1. They allow you to eat what you like, not what is healthy.

Eat folk sign: When you love a person, you want him to eat. Italians will probably agree with this statement, but will remind you that it is not the quantity, but the quality of food that is important. Food is not just food for survival, it is a way to gain pleasure. IN educational institutions and at home, children’s lunch usually consists of 4 courses: first (often pasta), second (something meat), vegetables, dessert. The main thing here is variety, and the portions themselves can be small.

Neither parents nor grandparents will force a child to eat. If he is not hungry, he will not be able to enjoy even the most delicious delicacy.

2. Enroll in creative sections and take them to museums

Italians have a love of art in their blood. Residents of other countries will probably remember many names of Italian masters from various fields: Petrarch, Michelangelo, Fellini. Children with early age go on excursions to museums and historical places with their parents and teachers. Schools hold creative activities, children often organize performances and music concerts for their parents.

Of course, each person has different abilities and talents. A child may not be able to draw or sing, but from an early age parents pay attention to the beauty around them. Art is not a vital thing, but it helps you feel and see the real values of the world.

3. They build a strong family nest and dine with a large group

Parents and children have breakfast together and can even have lunch - Italian schools specifically provide for a long lunch break so that the student can go home. Dinner is not just a meal, it is a meal when relatives can gather in a cozy restaurant near the house. Small children, parents, and grandparents sit at the same table. They communicate as equals, and no one feels out of place. All members of Italian families usually live in the same area.

4. Seek a balance between control and personal space.

Italian parents do not let their children go alone into the city; they ask about school affairs and personal life. Moms and dads strictly monitor games on the playground and don’t forget to put a warm sweater in their backpack in case it suddenly gets cold. Could it be that careful parental control is what ultimately gives birth to family cohesion?

Modern young Italians recognize that the degree of guardianship varies from region to region and sometimes develops into overbearing behavior. Therefore, young parents try to find a balance in their relationships with their children - to give them more personal space and independence. For example, do not follow them on their heels, but inquire about their location via SMS and social networks. They still take the child's problems seriously, but try not to be obsessed with overprotection.

5. Kind to other people's children

Parents are affectionate not only with their children, but also with others. In Italy, in general, they treat children and pregnant women with great care. On the streets, a child will always be smiled at, they can talk to him or play with him. Children are often treated to free food in restaurants and bakeries, and are placed on their laps in public transport and cafes. In such a good-natured environment, the child feels that there is much to be happy about in the world.

6. They ignore crying and tantrums.

One of the main distinctive features Italian parents - how they react to children's hysterics. We all know that a child can burst into tears in a crowded place, push away his parents and refuse to go. The Italians will remain calm in this situation. Parents will not be embarrassed and drag their child home, and those around them will not turn an ear.

Even Italian psychologists in the book “Don’t Program a Child” say that crying is natural process clearing strong emotions. A child cries not because he wants to disgrace you, he expresses fear, regret, inconvenience. If you stop the tears every time, the child will get used to hiding his feelings and will consider his feelings abnormal. The authors recommend abandoning the commands “Stop crying”, “Shame on you”, “Boys don’t cry”, as well as hissing sounds calling for silence. Instead, it is better to show concern: smile calmly, hug the child or put your hand on the shoulder.

7. They don’t care about success

Italians do not expect maximum achievements from their children in school and hobbies. In kindergartens and primary school The training program is very simple, no homework is assigned. Children are taught not to compete with others, but to work together, which is why educational institutions usually do not hold competitions between classmates.

At the same time, the knowledge and abilities of children will be assessed according to their merits. For example, recently an 8-year-old schoolboy came up with a new word for the Italian language - “petaloso”, which can be translated as “many-petaled”. The teacher helped him write a letter to linguistic experts, and his parents used social networks to share the neologism with the people. The word turned out to be euphonious for the language and became widespread. Now he will be included in the new edition of dictionaries, and the Italian Prime Minister himself congratulated the boy on Twitter.

8. Parents set an example, the child chooses

It is generally accepted that a child has the same rights as an adult. At the same time, parents know that their example has a strong influence. The child sees how mom and dad honor their parents, communicate closely with them, ask for advice and share secrets. The relationship between mother and daughter becomes as warm as that of mother and grandmother.

In Italy, children are allowed to make their own order in a cafe, and teenagers are tried not to be discriminated against in their choice of clothes, accessories and hair color. But adult Italians dress elegantly in everyday life, men can walk around the house in a suit, and women can go out to the store in their best dress. Therefore, gradually growing up Italians, along with their love of life, acquire impeccable taste.

Will you take note of the rules for raising Italians? What do you consider especially important?

DatsoPic 2.0 2009 by Andrey Datso

Italian popes

Unfortunately, in modern Italy two, and especially three, children are a rarity. According to statistics for 2011, there are 1.3 children per Italian family. Over the past decade, the percentage of families who cannot have children has increased greatly. The main reason is the woman's age. Of course, there are families with three or more children, but mostly these are families of the south of Italy or emigrants.

According to statistics for 2012, the average age of a primigravida woman in Italy is 31.8 years, in Russia, meanwhile, 25.8 years.

Early development

After giving birth to a child, a young mother usually tries to return to work as quickly as possible. And the reason for this is not only the economic crisis in the country, but also the reluctance to stay at home with the child. Usually they are “rented out” to grandparents or to paid nurseries. In large cities there are Montessori nurseries, Waldorf nurseries and even bilingual nurseries, where the baby will hear English spoken from birth. But there are only a few of them. In an ordinary nursery, the baby will be looked after, fed, put to bed, but there is no talk of the child’s early development. And it’s not that they don’t want to develop the child, but it’s not customary for them, and they simply don’t know how to do it at all.

Even if some mother wants to study with her baby, she will have certain difficulties: a very small amount of literature about preschool education, a small selection of educational games for kids (for my children I brought suitcases full of books and toys from Moscow) and practical absence of any groups for classes with children under 3 years old. The exceptions are music classes and swimming. Of course, this cannot be compared with Russia, where even in small towns you can find different clubs, groups, nurseries and kindergartens for every taste and budget.

Kindergarten (Scuolaterna)

In Italy, a child goes to kindergarten from the age of three. There he is taught to count, write, and prepared for school. Teachers pay special attention to the child’s adaptation in the team: group performances, games with the whole class are constantly held, and trips or excursions are carried out at the parents’ request. Usually 2 times a week a foreign language lesson is held in a playful way, most often it is English. Sports classes and music are held several times a week. A lot of time is devoted to creativity: appliqué, drawing, modeling. There are private and public kindergartens, but the program in them is basically the same.

Traditions

By the way, despite such an active life with the participation of children, slings that are so popular in Russia, convenient for walking, have not taken root here. In three years in Italy, I saw only three children in slings, and all of them were children of tourists. Perhaps Italian women use a sling at home, but they rarely go outside with it, giving a clear preference to classic strollers and backpacks.

Fears

Italians are very scared by stories of missing children, so it is extremely rare to see small children running around unattended. Most often, kids walk near their own house, fenced in by a fence, in the garden. It is not difficult to find families where the child is 10-13 years old, but he does not go out alone (not to mention children even younger). By the way, many foreign women let their children go out alone at the age of 6-7: for a true Italian mother this is something abnormal and even wild. Also, children are always picked up from school by their parents, or taken home by a school bus. According to statistics, 60% of Italian children spend their free time at home, watching TV, playing, and reading. This is also noticeable on the streets: there are many small children with their parents, there are also plenty of teenagers of about 15 years old, but children 7-13 years old are not particularly visible.

Features of education

In Italy, it is customary to address people as “you,” including to elders and teachers. This is not considered rudeness; moreover, it persists into adulthood: in Italy you address either people who are much older, or someone you are addressing for the first time (although many immediately switch to “you” if they are addressing someone of the same age or a slightly older person).

And at the end

Ekaterina Morozova

Reading time: 18 minutes

A A

In every corner of the planet, parents love their children equally deeply. But education is carried out in each country in its own way, in accordance with mentality, lifestyle and traditions. How do the basic principles of raising children differ in different countries?

America. Family is sacred!

For any American resident, family is sacred. There is no division between men's and women's responsibilities. Dads have time to devote time to both their wives and children, and not only on weekends.

Features of raising children in America

America. Features of mentality

Italy. A child is a gift from heaven!

An Italian family is, first of all, a clan. Even the most distant, most worthless relative is a family member whom the family will not abandon.

Features of raising children in Italy

Italy. Features of mentality

Considering that children do not know the word “no” and are generally not familiar with any prohibitions, they grow up to be absolutely liberated and artistic people.
Italians are considered the most passionate and charming people.
They do not tolerate criticism and do not change their habits.
Italians are satisfied with everything in their life and country, which they themselves consider blessed.

France. With mom - until the first gray hair

The family in France is strong and unshakable. So much so that children, even after thirty years, are in no hurry to leave their parents. Therefore, there is some truth in French infantilism and lack of initiative. Of course, French mothers are not attached to their children from morning to night - they manage to devote time to their child, their husband, work, and personal matters.

Features of raising children in France

France. Features of mentality

Russia. Carrot and stick

Russian families, as a rule, are always concerned with the issue of housing and the issue of money. The father is the breadwinner and breadwinner. He does not participate in housework and does not wipe the snot of whining children. Mom tries to save workplace all three years maternity leave. But usually he can’t stand it and goes to work earlier - either from lack of money or for reasons of mental balance.

Features of raising children in Russia

Russia. Features of mentality

The peculiarities of the Russian mentality are perfectly expressed by well-known aphorisms:

Whoever is not with us is against us.
Why miss something that floats into your hands?
Everything around is collective farm, everything around is mine.
Beats means he loves.
Religion is the opium of the people.
The master will come and judge us.

The mysterious and mysterious Russian soul is sometimes incomprehensible even to Russians themselves.

Soulful and warm-hearted, brave to the point of madness, hospitable and daring, they do not mince words.
Russians value space and freedom, easily slap children on the back of the head and immediately kiss them, pressing them to their chests.
Russians are conscientious, sympathetic and, at the same time, stern and adamant.
The basis of the Russian mentality is feelings, freedom, prayer and contemplation.

China. Getting used to work from the cradle

Main features Chinese family- cohesion, the secondary role of women in the home and the unquestioned authority of elders. Given the overpopulation of the country, a family in China cannot afford more than one baby. Based on this situation, children grow up capricious and spoiled. But only up to a certain age. Beginning with kindergarten, all indulgences stop, and the education of a tough character begins.

Features of raising children in China

China. Features of mentality

The foundations of Chinese society are modesty and submissiveness of women, respect for the head of the family, and strict upbringing of children.
Children are raised as future workers who must be prepared for hard, long hours of work.
Religion, observance of ancient traditions and the belief that inactivity is a symbol of destruction are invariably present in the daily life of the Chinese.
The main qualities of the Chinese are perseverance, patriotism, discipline, patience and unity.

How different we are!

Each country has its own traditions and its own principles of raising children. English parents have children at the age of about forty, use the services of nannies and raise their children to be future winners using all available methods. Cubans bathe children in love, easily push them off to their grandmothers and allow them to behave as liberated as the child desires. German children are wrapped only in smart clothes, protected even from their parents, everything is allowed to them, and they walk in any weather. In South Korea, children under seven years old are angels who are prohibited from being punished, and in Israel you can go to prison for yelling at a child. But whatever the traditions of education in a particular country, All parents have one thing in common - love for children.

In anticipation Orthodox Christmas- a holiday on which the birth of the infant Christ is glorified, I want to talk about how Italian families treat their children. Perhaps this will help many girls understand how to win the heart of an Italian.

From the rolling landscapes of Tuscany to the cobbled streets of Rome, Italian parents are known for their love of beautiful things, as well as their attitude towards children and large families. Italian parenting methods are very similar to Russian ones, but have some differences. Therefore, the Italian point of view on raising children, which I will call the “Italian way,” should not cause rejection in Russian women. And the way Italian gentlemen take care of their family evokes envy and sentimental feelings among most Russian women.

So, in Italy, where I have lived for the past 10 years and where my two children were born, parents are neither the rigid disciplinarians, as they are in Northern Europe, nor the carefree observers, as in Japan. And while there is something inherently absurd about the fact that 80 percent of men between the ages of 18 and 30 live with their parents, the “Italian style” still has what I consider to be a superior quality of parenting.

Walk into any restaurant in Milan or Rome, from ordinary to super expensive, at 10 pm and you will find children eating and talking while sitting at a table with adults. Sometimes they misbehave and adults rein them in by raising their voices and making warning gestures. At about 11 pm, some of them will doze off with their faces in the spaghetti or lying on their parents' laps, while the adults at this time will drink wine and snack as if nothing had happened.

Children are a positive and integral part of Italian society, and restaurants are just one of the places where you can see this touching attitude towards them. Because family is extremely important to Italians, they do not have the strict generational divisions that you see in America. If you go to a restaurant for lunch, you will meet people of different generations at the same table: children, teenagers, adults and grandparents. This is natural for Russians, but looks strange for Americans and Europeans, and this “Italian style” is meant to be shared at all stages of life with our family and community.

I believe that by visiting public places with friends and family, my children learn proper table manners, eating what is served to them, including anchovies and asparagus, engaging in adult conversation, and respecting others sharing the same space with them.

Children are not just brought into the restaurant, they are enthusiastically welcomed. It's unusual to see waiters lifting the little ones on their shoulders to better review, or how they bring a small pizza cutter for the kids to play with at the table

Italian children have a place in adult culture, and this culture plays a role in the child's socialization. They are kept away from adults who may find them noisy or annoying. At the same time, parents do not imagine their children as higher beings worthy of worship. Other than a booster seat for little ones, they rarely require special treatment. People smile at children on the bus, they talk to them at the fruit market, but when they don't eat vegetables in a restaurant, no one, not even their parents, pays attention.

This all reflects a certain ease with which members of an Italian family seem to live, living with each other and with different generations under the same roof. In this, the “Italian style” of education differs from the “Russian” one, where parents are forced to adapt to their children, rather than teaching them to “fit into” the existing system of society and family. In Italian families, this problem exists to a lesser extent.

For girls who want to marry an Italian, I remind you that Italians love fresh food. Forget processed chicken and microwave meals: Italians love to cook and love to eat. Food is seen as an integral part of life, worthy of spending time on. And they feed the children fresh food. They are focused on fresh products to avoid the extra salt, fat and sugar found in most processed foods.

Meal time is family time. Eating together is a priority in Italy: during this time, no one is distracted - no snacking on their feet or collapsing in front of the TV. Lunch can last two hours or more and during this time there can be much lively discussion around the table. Italians worry that their children are not eating enough and keep baby scales at home to make sure their flowers of life are gaining weight.

Italian mothers are obsessed with the cold and believe that a gust of wind made you sick. Don't sleep with wet hair, do not go outside when it rains and do not drink cold milk. And children must wear a T-shirt...

Italian mothers are known for their warm care, so warm that it can be detrimental to the independence and freedom of children. Children are not allowed to walk around the city alone; they are accompanied by their parents or older brother. Parents want to know what their children are doing and thinking - around the clock. Children are encouraged to live at home until they are married or even longer.

"Gentle" discipline. Parenting styles vary from region to region in Italy, but in most cases parents take a laid-back approach to discipline. Italian parents never spank their child. Instead, they teach primarily by example.

For example, wine is served with every meal and children are allowed to try it from an early age. Children can drink legally in bars at age 16, but rarely get into trouble with alcohol. One of the reasons is that for Italians, drinking is not something forbidden. Italian men, for the most part, although they drink a lot, are not alcoholics. Instead, they enjoy life and the practice of moderation. Harsh discipline can backfire and cause rebellion, so teach instead. Treat your children with respect and ask them for the same in return.

Italian parents may not have all the pedagogical answers, but they seem to enjoy life and their children. However, Italian parents are the first to criticize their own methods. The global economic crisis has them worried that their culture may encourage children to value pleasure and the abdication of responsibility. They are concerned that their emphasis on family contributes to children's long-term dependence on their parents and their childish behavior.