Three main skills of independent living that need to be taught to a child. What to teach a child so that he achieves success in the future What to teach a child in life

From birth, talk more with your baby, read books to him. He sees that mom is holding something in her hands, looks there and says something... Over time, he will also begin to look into the book. After all, she will understand what exactly mom is saying when she looks exactly there! The baby may not understand the meaning, but he understands the intonation. Tell him often the words that you would like to hear from your baby as quickly as possible. For example, at the age of one month I started saying the word “agu” a couple of times a day, and already at two months the child himself began to clearly say “agu”; I even filmed it on video. The most important thing is not to stop, constantly teach new words: “mom”, “dad”, etc. You can train yourself to say something at a certain time. For example, when we started eating, I said “am” to the baby with each spoon. Now, when he sees a bottle or jar of puree, he begins to repeat “am-am-am.” Every time your child wakes up, tell him: “Mom, I’m awake.” And he will repeat this when he wakes up. True, we are still far from a complete phrase, but he is already saying “mother”. Maybe not so clearly, but still he already knows that he needs to call his mother.

Talk to your baby as if you were an adult, and you will see how carefully he listens to you.

When I was little, televisions were very rare, so parents spent more time with their children, learning poems and songs. Children spent more time with books than with TV. Agree, this is not only more useful for people, but also more interesting. You just need to be interested. With the help of reading, a child develops his imagination and memory. Read to your child, play games with words from a very early age, from birth. Repeat every day those words that you would like him to remember, develop children's memory, pronounce the words clearly. And when your child tries to say something incorrectly, correct him by repeating the same word correctly. For example, a child says “tata”, meaning “dad”. Repeat “dad” after him correctly, and in a couple of days he will start speaking correctly. The same goes for other words.

We started learning to swim from birth, as soon as our belly button healed. After all, this is very useful for all muscle groups, and the lungs also develop. The faster the baby’s muscles get stronger, the faster he will crawl, and then start walking... Of course, we are learning to swim while at home in the bathroom; I decided not to go to the pool until a year. It's our birthday in two weeks, so we'll start going to the pool. But we don’t do so bad in the bathroom either.

We started early: in infancy the baby is not yet afraid of water, but later it will be more difficult to get rid of the fear of water. Of course, it’s a long way from a baby swimming independently: first he will need to get used to it. And then start training. As soon as your baby gets older, start breathing training. First you need to teach your child to inhale and exhale, then hold his breath. Very useful for training diving breathing. And in order to free the child from fear and achieve the exercise, you can scatter a lot of his favorite or even new toys along the bottom of the bath and ask the child to get them from the bottom.

Even during pregnancy, I began to often listen to calm music, and after the birth of my baby, I sang lullabies to him. After all, it is known that lullaby- first lesson of native speech.

Discussion

Thank you for the article. At first, when I saw the title, I again thought that it was something like “teaching a baby to read from the cradle.” But fortunately, I was wrong. I agree that you need to communicate with your baby, show him everything you do at home, this is his most important science in the first years. It also seems to me that the main goal of education up to the age of three is to teach a child to communicate with peers and adults, to be able to show his desires, to be able to express his emotions in a more or less civil way. And at what time a child learns to count or read - at 3 years old or at 4 - there is not much difference.

Comment on the article “What and how I teach my baby”

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Hello!

In one of our previous articles, we talked about how important it is when communicating with children (and not only!) maintain your boundaries. In your letters you write that this topic is not fully understood. And so today we will talk about personal boundaries. It affects each of us directly and in a very tangible way, and every day affects how we perceive our lives and the world around us.

My daughter Malya pushed me to think about the topic of boundaries. We were walking home from school with her; on the way, a toy fell out of her hands and fell into the mud. At that moment I was tired and full of my worries, and therefore I reacted automatically - with a click. My daughter’s immediate and sincere reaction instantly brought me back to a state of awareness: “Mom, why are you clicking? Don’t you ever drop anything?!”

What do you think her reaction says? She says that my child's boundaries are fine.

Once upon a time on social networks, I saw a post by a woman in which she described an incident from her life: while on vacation with her family, she accidentally and very forcefully crushed her son’s fingers with the trunk of a car. In this situation, she was “covered” with guilt and anxiety, her husband fell into a panic, and so the suffering child received, instead of support, the following parental reaction: “What are you thinking about?! You’re always sticking your hands in wherever you go!” So, that boy also had integral boundaries, so, defending himself, he shouted: “I’m in so much pain, and yet you attacked me!”

Let's think about how a child with already violated boundaries might react in this situation? He could: feel shame and guilt, inwardly shrink, shrink, outwardly hunch over. Maybe cry, start making excuses, withdraw into yourself, withdraw, etc. His thoughts could be like this: « CThere's something wrong about me. I’m bad, I drop everything and get it dirty all the time.”

Many adult people experience difficulties in life precisely because of violated personal boundaries. Such people are easy to manipulate and control; they often have a painful, distorted perception of life; any difficulties unsettle them. Remembering their childhood, they say that they were often shamed, blamed, as if making them feel bad. They taught not to think about themselves, to neglect their desires for the sake of other people or for the sake of duty. Remember the wonderful fairy tale “Morozko”? Where the youngest daughter, freezing in the forest, said that everything was fine with her and she was not cold.

Why do we need our boundaries, and how can we learn not to allow them to be crossed? Like the borders of the state, we need our borders in order to ensure the security of our personality and maintain its integrity. Are you familiar with these expressions: "She lost herself" or “I can’t find myself” or " She takes everything too personally." "She merged with him" etc. All these expressions indicate that the person being described has violated personal boundaries.

In order to learn not to allow our boundaries to be crossed, we need to feel and understand when, by whom and by what (what words or actions) these boundaries are violated. And everyone here has their own stories... For some reason, someone over and over again allows people of a certain type to push them around. Someone in similar critical situations completely loses strength and begins to collapse internally, loses strength, energy, and desire to live. But in any case, a lot depends on us. If our boundaries are strong, integral, and we are aware and feel them, then there is little that can be done to violate them.

And it is important for us to be able to protect and defend both our own boundaries (including from our children!), and to be able to pass on this ability to our children.

Let's summarize, in what situations does an invasion of personal boundaries occur?

When we confidently assert what another person should feel, want, think, do. For example: “How come you’re not hungry? Well, quickly sit down at the table!”
We let you down, break promises, do things that are not what we agreed on. For example: a situation of hidden adultery. This is also a violation of boundaries because the other side is not aware of the betrayal, she does not see the real situation and finds herself drawn into the triangle against her will. This is also why betrayal is always perceived and experienced very painfully. And some even say: " I feel dirty,” “It’s as if someone else climbed into my bed and trampled on everything dear and valuable.” “He turned my whole life into a sick joke!” There is a clear sense of boundary violation here.
We belittle or deny the feelings of another person. For example: “There’s nothing to be afraid of!”, “Why are you making this up, it wasn’t like that!”
We ignore others, don’t listen, interrupt (when communicating with children, many of us “sin” with this). Or we abruptly interrupt contact (if communication has already begun).
We enter the territory of another without asking, take things without asking, read personal letters, hug obsessively, touch another (we disrespect personal territory). For example: we go into a child’s room without knocking (from 5 years old it is better to knock), throw away toys without asking, read the child’s correspondence on social networks.
We don’t accept or respect someone else’s “no.”
We threaten punishment. For example: “If you don’t stop now, I’ll leave and not come back...I’ll go and live with dad...etc.”

This is one side of the issue of boundaries. It concerns how we can avoid violating them when communicating with other people (including children).

But there is another... Many parents, trying to be good moms and dads, overdo it in this endeavor, and begin to allow the child something that turns the children themselves into violators of other people's boundaries. As Anton Semenovich Makarenko wrote “There is no one more unhappy than a child who has defeated his own parents.” This is also true because such a child will lack the concept of boundaries and a sense of boundaries.

In order for a child, as an adult, to be accepted by society, successful and at the same time deeply personally satisfied with his life, he must be taught how to protect his own boundaries and respect the boundaries of another person (starting, of course, with his parents).

Surely, you have more than once seen children in transport or other public places behaving provocatively and disturbing the people around them. And their parents calmly allowed all this. This is usually associated with the good intentions of the latter to “give children freedom”, raise the child to be a person without complexes, etc. But in everything we need a golden mean and measure. As Immanuel Kant said: “Your freedom ends at the tip of another person’s nose.”.

So how can we teach a child to notice and take these “nose tips” into account in his behavior?

It often happens that we allow our children to do things that would offend us in relationships with other people or lead us to want to stop communicating.

What situations might these be?

The child interrupts us;
The child ignores our words, requests, does not answer us;
The child does not take into account our needs and desires, does not respect them (if we communicate them to the child);
The child speaks to us in a dismissive tone;
The child hits us in the face, throws objects at us (baby);
The child forces us to play with him;
The (older) child does not fulfill agreements and does not help with housework.

In absolutely all the cases described above, the child will behave this way only if we allow him to do so (or once allowed him to).

If we do not assert our right to be heard;
If we respond to any request of the child, even if it goes against our own desires, plans, etc.;
If we, in principle, do not know how to say a firm “no” to a child;
If we do not have enough strength, time, desire to achieve the desired behavior and help from the child;
If we haven't made enough effort to teach him a regimen, systematic training, etc. (by effort I do not mean pressure and strict control, but competent, motivating and developing interaction with the child).

My friends and acquaintances are often surprised that my daughter, who is 7 years old, is so caring and attentive to other people. In fact, it's simple. From an early age, I calmly shared my feelings and desires with her. I remember it often happened that I was doing something, my hands were busy, and she suddenly asked me to hold, do or give something to her. I never simply refused her without explanation. I directed her attention to what was happening and asked: “Do you see what I’m doing now? Do you see how many hands I have? Of course, this was repeated several times, and gradually she got used to paying attention to what I was doing and taking it into account. A similar thing happened when she tried to interrupt me in conversation.

That is, we simply calmly do not allow the child to violate our boundaries. It's not as difficult as it might seem. By doing this, we not only teach the child to respect the boundaries of another person, but also give an example of how to protect our own!

What can stop us from doing this?

Neurotic feeling of guilt (this is the topic of a separate article). People who feel guilty have a hard time saying “no.”
Sacrificial internal position. This is when we look outside for those to blame and really want to be good ourselves. For example: “Yes, everything is like my father, the genes are like that, nothing can be done”. Or: “Apparently this is my fate, everyone rides me.” Etc.
Chronic exhaustion. When we lose ourselves from fatigue, forgetting about our true desires and needs. We stop taking care of ourselves. We don’t allow ourselves to have time and space just for ourselves.
Internal fusion of mother and child, “mad” love for him. When a child is small, such a relationship between mother and baby is absolutely normal and appropriate. This is how nature intended, because otherwise the child simply would not survive. Any woman who has raised a child herself knows that sacrifices and constant infringement of her own needs at that stage are simply inevitable. And all this is transferred harmoniously precisely because of the absence of boundaries between mother and baby. They are one! But it often happens that this merger is delayed. The child is 5 years old, and the woman keeps talking about him: "We". “Our ears hurt”. A healthy kid pushes his mother around, is rude to her, and she allows him to do this or even admires him in return. Etc. That is, there is no internal separation. This is often due to the fact that a woman does not have her own life, interests, a full-fledged and nourishing relationship with a man, a favorite activity, etc.

At the same time, dear parents, there is an interesting pattern: If we don’t have our own boundaries (we don’t keep them) in communicating with children, then we inevitably deprive our children of boundaries. I think you have more than once met adults who are painfully attached to their mother, internally dependent on her, and not independent. Such people do not know how to feel whole in their separation from their mother.

What do you think is a sign that we have allowed our borders to be violated?

Severe irritation;
Discomfort;
Malice;
Incomprehensible melancholy despite external well-being;
The desire to leave contact, to “hide in your own hole.”

Unfortunately, many of us are not ready to realize and acknowledge such feelings in ourselves, and therefore such people have a weak sense of their boundaries.

In general, in the life of absolutely any person there are moments when boundaries are blurred, cease to be felt, and are violated. It is important that these are precisely the rare moments that we are aware of.

Dear parents, I am sure that you would say that there are situations (and there are many of them!) when we sacrifice a lot for the sake of our children, and this is normal. Agree with you! The difference is that normally it is our conscious choice to do something for the child, even at the cost of our discomfort and fatigue. And if the choice is ours, then everything is in order with our borders!

Let's learn to notice in ourselves both the victim and the violator of other people's borders? And, noticing, gradually learn other ways of interaction!

Author - Elena Shevchenko
Practicing psychologist, coach, author of books and presenter of trainings for parents.
Conducts consultations in Moscow and Voronezh or via Skype from any city or country.
To arrange a consultation, write by email or Skype: El.Shev.

25 useful things we can teach children

Right now, before our eyes, our children are acquiring habits. We will not participate in the birth of some of them; they will be dictated by nature and the environment surrounding the child. But there are things we can teach children at an early age so that these useful skills in the future will help them interact with other people and make life easier.
1. Be polite. Never before has using the words “thank you”, “please” and the ability to say good evening brought harm. On the contrary, good manners and friendly behavior simplify relationships between strangers, decorate any conversation, and open doors that might not be possible at first glance.
2. Be able to say “no.” A stranger on the way from school who offers to go with him to an unknown direction. A classmate who constantly borrows things and does not give them back without a reminder. A peer offering a cocktail at a school disco. Children need to understand that politeness is a wonderful quality, but they need to be able to make sacrifices for their own safety, self-respect and respect for their personal time.
3. Maintain hygiene. If from a young age you teach your child to take care of the cleanliness of his body: wash his hands after going outside, brush his teeth twice a day, cut his nails regularly, take a shower and use hygiene products, this habit will serve him well in the future. Everyone loves to deal with neat people.
4. Don't be late. Lack of punctuality is one of the biggest irritants. It can fail both a student at school and an office worker. Therefore, with slow children, it is worth making it a rule from an early age to leave the house ten minutes earlier, prepare clothes and textbooks in the evening to avoid the morning rush, and also set an example for parents to arrive on time for birthdays, friendly meetings or to the doctor. .
5. Follow safety rules. Vital rules must be developed to the point of automatism, while children are still small and, if necessary, repeated hundreds of times until they are “imprinted” in memory: do not cross the road at a red light, do not play on the roadway, use electrical appliances according to instructions, carefully handle fire.

6. Be able to listen. This is one of the most important skills that is useful both at school (perceiving information), and at work (passing interviews, negotiating), and in interpersonal relationships. Therefore, it is important for parents to listen carefully to their children. And also teach them to wait in line to speak, not to interrupt elders and to be attentive.
7. Stay focused. Modern children and adults are losing the ability to be assiduous, concentrate on one task and get to the point. We can teach children to cut out unnecessary things, not to be distracted by trifles, to concentrate on one task, and upon completion, move on to another.
8. Put things back in their place. By teaching your child to put away his toys and hang up the clothes he came home from school in, you can reduce the entropy of scattered things now and in the future.
9. Apologize. It is important not to treat mistakes as something shameful, and not to develop in the child a feeling of shame for any mistake. But it is necessary to introduce a simple word “sorry” into the lexicon when you step on someone’s foot, accidentally push or offend someone. The child should also hear this word from his parents. The ability to ask for forgiveness from someone you have hurt will help not only improve relationships, but also remove a heavy burden from your soul when you feel you are wrong.
10. Read. A person who reads will never be bored; literature will help with both his outlook and literacy. Therefore, the sooner books appear in a child’s hands, the more interesting and richer his life will be.
11. Eat right. Children learn eating habits from their parents, so if you want your kids to eat healthy food, you should start with yourself and with what we put on the table. Picky children will make a list of exceptions from the right food set, but if the parent’s diet contains only semi-finished products and sweets, it is difficult to imagine that the child would want to eat a vegetable salad.
12. Get acquainted. Starting in kindergarten, you can teach your child to approach other children and ask if they can play together. At first, a parent can take on the function of a leader and ask the child playing nearby on the playground what his name is, so that the children hear and remember how to make new acquaintances and friendships.

13. Respect personal space. For some tactile children, it doesn’t cost anything to meet a person and within five minutes sit on his lap. But not many people are ready to joyfully accept such a trusting attitude towards themselves. Therefore, open, tactile children need to be gently taught the concept of personal space, suggested how close they can come when talking with a stranger, who can be safely hugged and touched, and who may be frightened at first.
14. Express your feelings. In stressful situations, it is important for both parents and children to identify what is happening to them. And when quarrels happen, you must definitely talk about your feelings and teach children to say that they are hurt, offended, unpleasant or scared. The ability to express feelings will help you not to close yourself off and keep your feelings inside.
15. Ask questions. At the age of why, it is necessary to encourage children's questions and be sure to satisfy their curiosity. Then, in the future, children will not be afraid to ask questions to the teacher, they will want to find out the nature of thousands of important things, and thereby will show their concern for the world around them.
16. Be able to sympathize and sympathize. Helping a sick kitten, buying groceries for a lonely neighbor, or making a charitable contribution will allow the child to understand that he is not alone in this world. An honest conversation about difficult life situations and other people's pain will help you learn to put yourself in other people's shoes and understand how differently circumstances can develop.
17. Keep things in order. The ability to organize school supplies, neatly lay out clothes in the closet, and sort your creative materials greatly simplifies life. Parents themselves can decide at what age to entrust their children with cleaning their territory, but before this issue is finally placed under the children’s responsibility, helping around the house should become a habit.
18. Cook food. Children who know how to make a sandwich and a simple salad easily get used to camping, can help at family picnics, and simply don’t feel helpless if a parent is busy or not feeling well.

19. Do exercises. It’s great when sports are a part of life from childhood. But if your child is more drawn not to the sections and the pool, but to books and modeling, then even the simple habit of doing exercises in the morning will help to wake up, tone up the muscles and be with sports, if not on a friendly footing, then at least on a friendly footing.
20. Speaking in public. No matter how much some parents oppose the drill at kindergarten matinees, naive quatrains about bunnies and a fluffy Christmas tree are the first experience of public speaking, which will be practiced at school and college, and in many cases at work. Psychologists devote volumes of books to the ability to cope with the fear of speaking, but we can encourage and rejoice first with poems for Santa Claus, and during school years we can help think through the concept of speaking and set children up for success.
21. Understand the nature of money. The child will get his first idea of money while playing at the store, but he will not soon learn the real price of what he has earned. The parent's task is to teach them financial literacy before children enter independent life. Everyone will decide for themselves what exactly they need to know: how to budget, pay bills, save, save part of their income or invest it. It is important that, once children start earning money, they understand how to manage it skillfully.
22. Believe in the best. Life is easier for optimists; there is always light at the end of their tunnel. We cannot influence what kind of temperament our children will get, but we can instill confidence in sad melancholic people, set them up for the best, believe in our children and demonstrate a positive attitude towards life by our own example.
23. Bring things to completion. Perseverance and reluctance to give up halfway what doesn’t work out is not the most common quality in children. But it is still worth developing, because in the future we will face challenges that cannot be abandoned like an unfinished tower. In order for a child to learn to achieve his goal, he needs to be given simple tasks and gradually increase their complexity. And when difficulties arise, show how you can ask for help, how to look for a way to solve problems and bring what you started to the end. And be sure to let them feel the satisfaction of a job well done and completed.

24. Share. Nowadays they often say that you shouldn’t force a child to share things if he doesn’t want to. And, in general, it’s hard to disagree with this; you just need to project onto yourself a situation where we, adults, are asked to give someone something that we ourselves need. But still, there is great human meaning in being able to share what you have with another person. Jack London also wrote that mercy is a bone shared with a dog when you are as hungry as it is.
25. Take care of loved ones. Seeing that someone needs care and participation (a grandmother living alone, a sick aunt, a friend who has broken an arm), and just offering your help is very important for friendship, and for future family life, and in order to become as a parent yourself, be able to unconditionally give your love, time and energy to your children, without thinking about what you will get in return.

Most parents complain that their children do not like to read. The modern generation prefers gadgets. What to do? How to teach a child to love a book?

- "I want to go out!"

- “Until you read twenty pages of a book, you won’t sit down at the computer, and you won’t go for a walk!” Unfortunately, such dialogue can be heard in many families. If you are trying to instill in your child a love of reading, then we can assure you that you will not succeed.

It is impossible to awaken a love of books in a child under pressure or coercion.

The process of reading should give him pleasure. How to achieve this? In this article we will try to answer this question, relying on pedagogical experience and advice from child psychologists. But first, let’s define the concept of “early child development” and talk about modern methods of such development. Young mothers inevitably face an avalanche of very different opinions on this matter. Some argue that the process of teaching a child should begin from the first days of his birth. Others are sure that early development does more harm than good.

Undoubtedly, we live in a high-tech world. And this world is merciless, it requires adaptation of the intellect even from children. It is not surprising that many young mothers, having learned about newfangled early development methods, try to put them into practice. For example, they begin to instill in their child a love of reading right from the cradle. Are modern early development methods harmful or beneficial for children? Let's try to figure it out.

When and how can early development be harmful?

Undoubtedly, early age (from 0 to 6 years) is the most important stage that determines the future development of a person.
Scientists say that insufficient stimulation of the baby's brain during this life period can lead to irreversible negative consequences.
Neurophysiologists, based on the results of their research, authoritatively state that the main neural connections in a child’s brain are formed before the age of three.

Scientific research on the benefits of early development

It was the scientific discoveries described above that prompted the Japanese businessman Ibuka Masaru to develop his own method and publish the book “After Three It’s Too Late.” In this book, the Japanese engineer proves that the giftedness of any child depends on a properly organized environment and parental efforts. Ibuka Masaru developed his method based on a scientifically proven fact - a child’s brain is capable of absorbing many times more information than an adult’s brain. The book gained great popularity all over the world. There are many supporters of this technique, but there are also ardent opponents.

Of course, all mothers strive to develop their babies not only physically, but also mentally. And they do this with the help of books, communication, and educational activities. Some parents, armed with Zaitsev's cubes or G. Doman's cards, begin quite serious activities with their baby. What is this? Personal ambitions, the desire to raise a genius, the desire to surprise girlfriends? A child who can read at the age of three is great! Not sure!

Negative consequences of early education

Unfortunately, talk about the dangers of early education for children is reality, not a myth. And many experts talk about this. Most often, neurologists are faced with the negative consequences of early educational “experiments.” It is to them that mothers turn to with complaints about certain nervous disorders that have unexpectedly arisen in their child. The baby does not want to study, is capricious, has lost his appetite, and cannot concentrate. What caused such changes in the child’s behavior? It turns out that about a month ago my mother began teaching her baby (at the age of one or one and a half years) to read and count. But these are not the saddest consequences of using modern early development methods.

Due to overload of the central nervous system during classes, children may experience sleep disturbances, enuresis, nervous tics, and stuttering.
The baby may complain of headaches and may experience serious endocrine disorders.
Educational activities that are not age-appropriate can cause mental stress in children.
Scientists have proven that a child’s brain develops in stages. Last to mature are the areas responsible for the perception of abstract information and for the control of emotions and will. If a mother tries to teach her baby the alphabet or forces a one-year-old baby to study according to one of the educational programs, nothing good can be expected. Children at this age should explore the world by running and playing.
Delayed development of reading skills can lead to a decrease in the “plasticity” of the brain. Forced replacement of immature neural circuits with accessible ones can further lead to inhibition of intellectual development. You should not give a small child logic tasks. After all, the parietal areas of the brain, which are responsible for logic, fully develop only by the age of 13.
We will not delve too deeply into the anatomical features of the development of the child’s brain. But we have no right not to talk about the consequences of overloading the unformed frontal parts of the brain. A small child can learn to read, but it will not bring him any benefit or pleasure.
Disturbances in brain development can be irreversible, which in the future will negatively affect the child’s mental abilities. Such children, as a rule, study poorly, are easily distracted in class, and have difficulty concentrating on anything. They are lethargic, apathetic, their speech is poor, they have difficulty perceiving any new information.
Most children's doctors are against the use of any methods of early childhood development. But, of course, it’s up to the parents to decide.

When is the best time to start teaching a child to read - expert opinions

The best age for learning

The optimal age for teaching a child to read is considered to be the period from 4-6 years. By this age, children have already sufficiently developed the articular apparatus, they are able to fix their attention on the task assigned to them. By the way, there is plenty of time before entering school.

How to understand that a child is ready to learn: tips

Many parents are interested in the question: “Is it possible to independently determine whether a child is ready for learning without the participation of specialists?” Of course it is possible. And it’s not at all difficult to do. To ensure that classes are not a burden and bring pleasure to the child, he must have some skills and knowledge.

Namely:

The child should not have speech therapy problems. If the baby does not pronounce certain sounds, parents should take him to a speech therapist. The doctor will select the necessary exercises for speech development. It is possible that a short frenulum of the tongue prevents the child from pronouncing sounds correctly. At the dental clinic, the surgeon will trim the frenulum and the problem will be solved. For a child, this process is easy and almost painless.
The child must have developed phonetic hearing. The baby can already recognize sounds in a word.
He is perfectly oriented in space. Understands the meaning of words: right, left, down, up.
The baby can speak in sentences, can independently compose a story based on a picture, and retell a fairy tale.
He shows a clear interest in reading.

Training should be structured taking into account the age and psychological characteristics of the child. there are quite a few.

Traditional teaching methods are considered one of the most effective. ABC reading . The point of the classes is to consistently study letters, and then words. This is very painstaking work that requires perseverance. This technique allows you to use game moments.
Nikolai Zaitsev's cubes . This technique is based on combining a consonant with a vowel and vice versa. The child immediately learns syllables.
G. Doman's technique . Pictures are used during training. The child learns to perceive the word as a whole. This technique perfectly trains a child’s visual memory.
Also considered effective training programs by E. Chaplygin and V. Voskobovich .

You can learn more about these programs on specialized websites. Methods of teaching reading are selected individually depending on the psycho-emotional development of the child.

How and when to teach a hyperactive and restless child to read

Many mothers of hyperactive children are sure that it is impossible to teach their child to read before school. However, this is a misconception. Of course, for a restless child you need to select special teaching methods.

For example, learning to read using Zhukova’s ABC book. Speech therapist Nadezhda Zhukova offers an interesting speech therapy technique for adding syllables. The ABC book contains many colorful pictures that children like. There are detailed recommendations for parents on the pages of the book. According to many mothers of hyperactive children, this technique (unlike many others) allows you to interest the child.

The computer program “Baba Yaga Learns to Read” also received good reviews. This program is a fairy tale alphabet in verse. Bright animation, funny animation, interesting magical characters can attract the attention of even the most restless children. To find and return the letters to the alphabet, little players will have to go through ten difficult tests. During this game, children will not only learn to read, but also try to compose funny rhymes. There is a lot of music recorded on the disc; restless people will certainly enjoy the funny songs and mischievous ditties.

Child psychologists recommend that parents cultivate perseverance in children from early childhood. A hyperactive child cannot sit still for more than fifteen minutes. When choosing a technique, this feature must be taken into account.
Experts recommend giving the child time to rest every fifteen minutes of training.
Parents should start by reading fairy tales out loud. But adults should not turn into “reading slaves.”
As soon as the child gets involved in the process, the initiative must be transferred to him.
Overly active children with attention problems need to purchase special educational games. There are quite a lot of them on sale. Having fallen in love with entertaining word games, your child will be able to smoothly move on to reading.

Modern children live and study in a world of high technology. The international company AVG Technologies recently published data from one of its studies, according to which 58% of children under the age of five can easily and quickly understand a computer, but cannot have breakfast without the help of their parents. What about breakfast - many modern first-graders do not know how to tie their shoelaces, so they cannot even put on their shoes without the help of adults. But the whole point is that parents sometimes simply forget that children need to be taught basic everyday things. And if you want your child to grow up independent, teach him simple life skills.

The most suitable age to begin developing household skills is 4 years old, that is, at 4 years old you should start tying shoelaces, clearing the table, etc., so that by the age of six he can cope well with all these tasks. However, children often develop interest in everyday activities much earlier; it is important not to miss this moment and take advantage of the situation correctly. The sooner a child begins to learn everyday skills, the more independent he will become, and an independent child will develop faster in everything.

So, what should a child be able to do and how to teach him this? We'll walk you through developing some of the skills you need.

Clean apartment

Keep rags or sponges on hand so your child can clean up spilled toothpaste from the sink as a completely natural activity. Just show him how to do it several times and focus your baby’s attention on the fact that he needs to clean up after himself.

Young children usually enjoy doing housework because they like to do everything like their mother does. So take advantage of this and involve your child in cleaning more often. You can give a rag to a three-year-old child so that he can walk around the apartment with it and repeat everything after you. Perhaps after such “cleaning” you will have to remove the fragments of a broken vase or spend hours looking for the TV remote hidden in the back of the sofa, but do not scold your child, so as not to discourage him from helping you.

At 4–5 years old, a child can already consciously engage in cleaning: for example, putting away his toys or taking away dirty dishes from the table. By the age of 6–7 years, he can already dust, sweep and vacuum. First under your control, and then independently. At first, you will most likely have to redo everything after your child. But this should not upset or embarrass you. Always praise your child for the work done and for the effort. If you put in the effort, the skill will come with experience.

Wash clothes

Even many teenagers do not know how to wash clothes. Don't let your child become one of them. Children as young as two years old will be happy to take laundry out of the washing machine and bring it to you. Do not forbid him to repeat your actions and patiently show him how to do it correctly. By the age of 5, your baby will already be able to take out laundry more or less neatly and hand it to you so that you can hang it on the dryer.

At the age of six, you can already teach your child to wash clothes. Tell us about the operating modes of your washing machine. Show what algorithm of actions needs to be performed: load dirty laundry of the same color, add washing powder and rinse aid, select settings and start the machine - your child is already old enough to figure it out.

To grow plants

A child begins to develop a conscious interest in nature by the age of three, which means that it’s time to teach him how to treat plants with care, and the best way to do this is to grow something yourself. Nowadays, many sets are sold, consisting of plant seeds, soil, fertilizers and a pot, but you can buy all of this separately or even find it at your dacha. Children love to care for plants, especially when they are grown with their own hands. And if you not only watch the growth of a seedling, but also look into a book on botany, then the child will learn a lot of new things and, perhaps, become interested in this topic. When he goes to school, it will be easier for him to learn about the world around him. In addition, this way the child will learn care and responsibility.

Wrap gifts

All children develop an interest in gift wrapping at different ages, but if your child already understands that giving gifts is just as enjoyable as receiving them, then it’s time to introduce him to packaging materials. Your child can first help you choose the paper, and then cut it and stick it with tape. There are many ideas on the Internet on how to wrap a gift beautifully and neatly, so feel free to use them. In this way, the child will learn accuracy and perseverance. By the way, gift wrapping is a great way to develop motor skills in young children, so get even the little ones involved in this activity.

Cook simple meals

If your child is already 4 years old, then ask him to help you prepare food. Trust him with some simple work and don’t worry when he spills or gets something dirty, because by making mistakes, he learns to do everything carefully and quickly. Yogurt with fruit is a great example of a DIY breakfast. Children as young as 4 years old can put yogurt in a bowl, wash fruit, and by 6 years old they can already cut something under your supervision and make sandwiches. By the age of 7, a child can learn to make a vegetable salad. From 8–9 years old, children can begin to use the stove under adult supervision. The main thing you need to pay attention to is safety. Teach your child how to use electrical appliances or a gas stove.

Cooking together is a great way to unite leisure time and consolidate family traditions. Let it be customary in your family, for example, to make dumplings together and cook pies with cabbage before the New Year. Children will look forward to this moment no less than the holiday itself.

Shopping

It seems like shopping is something you don't need to learn at all. But that's not true. When taking your child to the store with you, always, at any age, tell him why you are buying this or that product - let him remember its name and purpose.

Starting from the age of 4, you can involve your child in making a shopping list, because he already knows what everything is called and can help you with it. Decide right away whether you will buy treats and in what quantities, and in the store, invite your child to fill the basket himself, based on the list. He must understand that he cannot take anything more than planned. Comment on your child's actions. Talk about a budget and unexpected expenses. Teach him to save: “Today we won’t buy a chocolate bar, but rather we’ll save money and next time we can buy a bigger chocolate bar.”

Of course, we have not named all the skills that are worth it, but only some of them, but we hope that now you understand that it is easy to do. The main thing is to do this unobtrusively, naturally and constantly, gradually complicating the tasks assigned to the baby. And for learning to be enjoyable, the baby needs to be stimulated with praise, because for him, mom’s or dad’s approval means a lot.

Valeria Shitik